“The difference between what we do and what we are capable of doing would suffice to solve most of the world’s problems.”

~ Mahatma Gandhi

One way we can do more in our everyday lives to effect positive change in our communities is to become an active bystander. What is meant by the term active bystander?

An active bystander:
• is someone who sees inappropriate or violent behavior and takes action
• chooses to diffuse and prevent potentially dangerous situations
• can even prevent violent and inappropriate behavior when they observe the warning signs and take action early
• is calm, kind and approachable

Here are a few ways you might intervene as an active bystander:
• a comment that helps defuse the situation
• showing disapproval of/speaking out against harmful actions when you see them
• express care/compassion for the recipient/target of the inappropriate or violent behavior
• casually remove the person from the aggressor/group of aggressors
• find an authority figure to intervene
• join with other caring and compassionate bystanders to take constructive action

Additional small, every single day actions:
• redirect the conversation when someone blames the victim for being sexually assaulted, instead focus on holding the perpetrator accountable for their own behavior and actions
• suggest a different motivator when you hear someone tell a boy he is playing like a girl
• intervene when someone tells a sexist or racist joke


Each of these situations left unchecked, and many more like them, contributes to a society that allows domestic and sexual abuse to continue. That is why we must commit to make these seemingly small interventions part of our everyday routine. Some people may think, “It’s none of my business”, “It’s a family issue”, “I don’t want to make a big deal out of something so small” or “I’m just one person, I can’t make a difference”. Challenge these thoughts and challenge yourself to take action anyway.

Over time these actions will become more comfortable. Taking small actions and speaking up every day will create positive change that will help end the culture of violence that impacts our daughters, sisters, mothers, partners, friends and neighbors.